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The reason Japanese people are tied up in every day life

Although some people spend more time doing things they like to do, I think most Japanese give the first priority doing their jobs or studies and spend more time doing what they should do. In Japan, fifty percent of young people enroll into university or college to study for their future. They have many assignments to do after school and some of them even do part-time jobs to earn money. Writing papers takes long time and they have to work a long shift to afford themselves.
For another example, most workers tend to do overwork in Japan. Even if they could finish their work earlier, they have to join a drinking party with their bosses or co-workers, which is part of our culture. Going out for drink after finishing work is thought to be necessary to create good relationships with their colleagues in most companies.

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Comment(s)

Well done, Yuka! One thing I wasn't sure about was the "afford themselves" part. It wasn't clear to me what they were paying for, so I guessed you meant the tuition. Sorry if that was an incorrect assumption!
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Corrections

The reason Japanese people are tied up in every day life
Although some people spend more time doing things that they like to do, I think most Japanese give the people make their first priority doing their jobs or studies and spend more time doing what they think they should do. In Japan, fifty percent of young people enroll enrol into a university or college to study for their future. They have many assignments to do after school and some of them even do part-time jobs to earn money. Writing papers takes a long time and they have to work a long shift to afford themselves it .
For another Another example , is that most workers tend to do overwork in Japan. Even if they could finish their work earlier, they have to join go out to a drinking party with their bosses or co-workers, which is part of our culture. Going out for drink after finishing work is thought to be necessary to create good relationships with their colleagues in most companies.
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The reason Japanese people are tied up in every day life
Although some people spend more time doing things they like to do , I think most Japanese give the first priority people prioritise doing their jobs or studies and spend more time doing what they should do what they "should", such as their jobs or studying, over everything else . In Japan, fifty percent of young people enroll into enrol at university or college to study for their future. They have many assignments to do complete after school and some of them even do have part-time jobs to earn money. Writing papers takes a long time and they have to work a long shift shifts to afford themselves be able to pay their tuition .
For another Another example , is that most workers employees tend to do overwork in Japan. Even if when they could finish their work earlier tasks early , they have to join a drinking party go out for drinks with their bosses or co-workers, which is part of our culture. Going In most companies, going out for drink drinks after finishing work is thought to be necessary to create good relationships with their colleagues in most companies .
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